Wtf

 My Moms A Fucking Baller,

 Yet I'm Not.

My mother on tuesday had her back window of her prius broken in. She was really disgruntled for that car has been rear ended, side swiped, stolen and brought back (yes a crackhead stole the car and brought it back a few days later), been back into a lightpost, and hit while parked. She had been talking about possibly going to trade her car in arround christmas time to buy maybe a Beamer or another Mercedes or w/e.

So a day goes by.

I in the morning asked my mother for a 20 for gas cause my 97 jeep wrangler isn't to fuel efficient.  She leaves me 10 and says thats all she has. "/. Now this has been going on for a while. My mom has been all super stingy with me and giving me the bare minimum of what she can possibly do like im a nephew or some shit.

So later in the day I get a phone call from my mom. 

Mother - Guess what i did???

Me - What?

Mother - I bought an Brand new Auti Convertable 2.0 turbo white with beige interior.

Me - Holy christ!!!!. Whend You go to the dealership? Arent you at work?

Mother - Yea I'm at work. I bought it in one payment over the phone!

Me - .....

Now if you remember her not being able to give me 20 dollars cause she "Didnt have it". Yet she was able to purchase a 40 something thousand dollar car in one payment over the phone within the same day.

This is following the event in which my mother maxed out her Bloomingdales credit card on a sale. Her card's max is 5,000. Now Bloomingdales has a mens and womens department if im not mistaken for I myself, have purchased a substantial amount of items for dressier events. But no. Not a damn thing in that 5,000 splurge had anything for me. 

Now I'm not trying to act spoiled. Or you know throw a lame ass fit cause my mother isn't getting me anything.

But Fuck Man!

I'm really sick of her like throwing money away in my face, yet seeing me struggle with my miniscule financial difficulties that to her would be a mere fraction of anything shed consider an issue. Like from her buying 5,000 dollars worth of clothes without once thinking about me, to her purchasing a fucking car in one payment within the same day of her saying she couldn't spare 20 dollars. I don't really know how i should react about this without seeming like a spoiled child. Yet it's really wearing on my nerves.

The Concept Of A Warrior.

See I'm more than intrigued than anything by a Warriors Spirit.

I love the mentality that comes from a fighter.

The glory reaped from a just battle between two fierce competitors.

It explains why I've been doing boxing off and on for about 3 years. It's only been off and on because I've always wanted someone to train me. You know like in the movies?

 Lame I Know

But seriously. I would be the greatest of students. As soon as i learn a new punch or way to further myself I'd do it till it aches to bad to do it anymore without rest. My mother never approved of me joining any serious team because she feels it would ruin any chance of me doing commercials for damage to my face. 

Knowing my hatred of being in front a camera

So I tried doing Muy Thai for like 2 and a half months. It was Amazing! But i started complaining about the pain in my shins from kicking all day. So my Sansei explained how i needed to roll an olive oil bottle covered in olive oil as hard as i could up and down my shins till I killed the nerve endings so i would stop feeling the pain. 

Not stopping damage to my shins. Just not feeling the pain.

So I stopped Muy Thai and went back to boxing. But again no specific trainers who would be able to take me through a day by day. So I'm now doing Brazilian Jui Jitzu.

If You've ever seen a UFC fight its what they mainly use for the grapples, Submissions, Throws, and Takedowns.

I love the concept of the personal training and demonstrating and learning by doing. Like you learn a grapple then you practice with your partner till you understand it. Then learn how to use it in combat. This is no Taekwondo. It's serious shit that leaves me with sore joints from all the submissions that the 50 year old teacher made me tap out effortlessly with.

Maybe I Was Born In The Wrong Era?

You know like maybe I was supposed to be in the Renaissance because I so would have been a knight. Or maybe in the Roman empire days so i could have fought as a gladiator. I believe how much better the world would be when the greatest invention would have been a crossbow? In the old days a leader was a great man respected in battle for his bravado and his words for his intellect and wisdom through experience. 

How many modern warriors were killed by stray bullets in our war in iraq fighting a daddy's boy president's agenda?

You could never catch a stray sword in a vital organ by chance in the ancient days.

I Don't know, Maybe I'm Just A Nerd Fantasizing.

Women.

I was having a conversation today with my boy jeffery.

J - "Man these hoes is just jockin the shit out of my nuts lately. 

Like just the other week I had this bitch pay for my meal and

then gave her the permission to suck me off in my car."

(Now I'm not putting you on blast cause i told you I'd write about this)

See me and Jeff fight all the time about everyday shit because were both extremely stubborn and have very strong personalities and nooormally a decent argument to uphold.

But What In The Fuck Is This Nigga Really Talking About?

See this hit me hard cause I'm so tired of men being disrespectful to women and treating them like dogs.  Now see I'm raised from a single mother. So as soon as i start to hear some disrespectful shit about any woman I raise up because i feel as if it's not checked then that same ignorance could be portrayed to her and i just won't allow it.

I've heard some of the most disrespectful shit just in this past week alone.  An old friend of mine told me how her ex used to hit her! Like seriously fucking deck her and her not do anything about it.  All i could do is look in awe because again, I looked at it as something that could happen to my mother and my blood boiled.

(Not like my mother wouldn't cut off every knuckle that hit her)

But Still.

 I couldn't even imagine the thought of raising a hand to a female in the sheer shame I'd be doing to my mother and coming from an abusive household where I myself was on the wrong side of a drunk fist for 8 years.

Hearing these dreadful stories will make you look at some of todays relationships in disgust.  My mother made sure i knew what it meant to be a man for knowing that i one day would be a husband and father of my own.

My Mother - "The man is the spine and the woman is the muscle.  For even while the man is the sturdy backbone in the relationship, he still wouldn't be able to move a damn inch if the muscle surrounding him was weak."

See I live by those words, and treat my woman accordingly.

It's too sad that so many males these days, don't.

I'm So Tired

I'm so tired of gas prices

I'm so tired of traffic tickets

I'm so tired of having a curfew

I'm so tired of passive aggressiveness

I'm so tired of indecisiveness

I'm so tired of "coincidences"

I'm so tired of little kids acting tough

I'm so tired of my mom eating the last of my cereal

I'm so tired of feeling like I'm not accomplishing Anything

I'm so tired of working dead-end jobs

I'm so tired of my cars mechanic bill never being under 500

I'm so tired of my mom bitching at me about leaving the lights on

I'm so tired of people thinking they know me

I'm so tired of followers

I'm so tired of cliques

I'm so tired of functions

I'm so tired of skinny jeans

I'm so tired of the Fucking Valley

I'm so tired of reality T.V. droning out the sound of true love

I'm so tired of everyone being a photographer

I'm so tired of everyone taking everything so seriously

I'm so tired of ignorance

I'm so tired me shrinking all of my t shirts

I'm so tired of my hair

I'm so tired of my computer always running out of memory

I'm so tired of people copying your shit and acting like they started it

I'm so tired of my mom having so much money and me having none

I'm so tired of my sidekick

I'm so tired of dusty bitches not catching a hint

I'm so tired of my hats not fitting right cause my hairs too long

I'm so tired of working at Ruehl

I'm so tired of my dishwasher smelling like mildew

I'm so tired of needing some new jeans

I'm so tired of people thinking i give a fuck

I'm so tired of gossip

I'm so tired of trying to make something out of my dance career

I'm so tired of getting stood up

I'm so tired of oversleeping and then being tired all day

I'm so tired of lacking initiative

I'm so tired of not being in college

I'm so tired of people trying to find new ways to abbreviate shit on aim

I'm so tired of sugary ass niggas trying to act so tough

I'mso tired of worrying about getting stabed in a fist fight

I'm so tired of people being scared what other people think

I'm so tired of the blue light on my sidekick

I'm so tired of people just wanting to "chill"

I'm so tired of trying to be what my father is not

I'm so tired of my mother always choosing her career over me

I'm so tired of being an asshole

I'm so tired of losing my headphones

I'm so tired of my cat acting Bi-Polar

I'm so tired of not being able too find a good book

I'm so tired of my xbox still being broken when all the good games come out

I'm so tired of just about everything.

My Place Of Business

I've been working at Ruehl in the Topnaga Mall for about 3 shifts now. 

(Thats means 3 days to all you unknowing unemployed folk)

It has to be the most boring and repetitive jobs, I in my short life have ever had to maintain.  I've been fired from the other 3 jobs I've held; the last two being because of my 

"Aggressive Attitude".

On That Note.

 I'd Like To Say My Suck My Dick To California Chiken Cafe And Pinz Bowling Alley

But now im stuck at this mind numbing job of being a model at some over priced Mental Ward chalk full of projectile spit-talking managers and cry baby staff all under the same superficial roof.

I mean for Christ's sake you can't even stop people from stealing shit even when its fucking obvious! I have to stand there like an idiot and if i see you putting some jeans in your purse say something retarded like,

 

"Are you sure those are your size?" 

Or no maybe i'll bust out with my favorite that my manager swears up and down will deter you from leaving the store with their bullshit, hundred dollar, fubu look-a-like jeans. He swears it will stop criminals in their tracks from stealing and might even give you a tip for not turning them in and feeling guilty.

Are you ready for the Magical Punchline?

Are you Sure....?

Ok here it is!!!!

"Would you like some sandals to go with those?"

......

Yup....Thats It.

I swear to god I'll kiss this man balls if i ask somebody 

"Would you like some sandals to go with those?"

 and they turn to me and say 

"You know what? I don't even feel like stealing these anymore"

 and place them back into my posession, and then give me 5 bucks for being so smooth about it.

So if you see me with my eyes glazed over, posted up on some support beam of Ruehls store front; feel free to shoot me right in my face because thats probably all im dreaming of. Someone to put me out of my misery or on extended medical leave so that i can at least try to get the Techno Mix of Copa Cobana out of my head.

The Predictable Nature Of Human Beings

i hate people.

This isn't to be confused with my love for my few friends and wife.  They are of a unique breed of people that keep me level headed and often quite sane.

Everyone for the most part is typical, predictable and for the most part obvious in even their most devious thoughts.  

I Could Say "I Can Guess What It Is Exactly Your Intentions Are Right Now"

And Your Response Would Be Nothing But "Prove It"

You say this so that you in a sense could validate yourself as being complex and "Not Of The Norm", by me making a simple mistake at some point of my explanation by over generalizing you based on my biased belief of your overall demeanor.

If you were to gander through the eyes of a cynic you'd truly understand my skewed perception of this world we live in. 

I Hate People.