My Place Of Business

I've been working at Ruehl in the Topnaga Mall for about 3 shifts now. 

(Thats means 3 days to all you unknowing unemployed folk)

It has to be the most boring and repetitive jobs, I in my short life have ever had to maintain.  I've been fired from the other 3 jobs I've held; the last two being because of my 

"Aggressive Attitude".

On That Note.

 I'd Like To Say My Suck My Dick To California Chiken Cafe And Pinz Bowling Alley

But now im stuck at this mind numbing job of being a model at some over priced Mental Ward chalk full of projectile spit-talking managers and cry baby staff all under the same superficial roof.

I mean for Christ's sake you can't even stop people from stealing shit even when its fucking obvious! I have to stand there like an idiot and if i see you putting some jeans in your purse say something retarded like,

 

"Are you sure those are your size?" 

Or no maybe i'll bust out with my favorite that my manager swears up and down will deter you from leaving the store with their bullshit, hundred dollar, fubu look-a-like jeans. He swears it will stop criminals in their tracks from stealing and might even give you a tip for not turning them in and feeling guilty.

Are you ready for the Magical Punchline?

Are you Sure....?

Ok here it is!!!!

"Would you like some sandals to go with those?"

......

Yup....Thats It.

I swear to god I'll kiss this man balls if i ask somebody 

"Would you like some sandals to go with those?"

 and they turn to me and say 

"You know what? I don't even feel like stealing these anymore"

 and place them back into my posession, and then give me 5 bucks for being so smooth about it.

So if you see me with my eyes glazed over, posted up on some support beam of Ruehls store front; feel free to shoot me right in my face because thats probably all im dreaming of. Someone to put me out of my misery or on extended medical leave so that i can at least try to get the Techno Mix of Copa Cobana out of my head.